When flatmates become family members

Up until then I only had one appointment to see a flat. Manu, my contact for it, wrote me three hours after my arrival in Spain that I could come over now to see the room. I was tired and wanted to suggest to come by the next day, but for some reason I changed my mind and went to see it.

That was the best decision I could have made and the beginning of my friendship to Manu!

At the door I was greeted by a tall Spaniard. After getting a tour through the apartment we started talking and got along so well that we didn't notice how one hour passed. When I went back to the hostel I had mixed feelings. On one hand I liked the general ambiance of the flat, on the other hand I had my parents words ringing in my ears: “Don't take the first room you'll see. Check what you can expect for what price”. I didn't get my hopes up, especially because Manu had received over 50 messages about the room.

The next day, however, I caught myself waiting for a message and didn't want to leave the hostel with its Wi-Fi which connected me with the world and, most importantly, with Manu. At 2pm I received the message: “You can move in with us. Come whenever you want.” Hallelujah! One viewing and the jackpot, I could see the envy in the eyes of the other Erasmus students who were still searching for rooms.

The first day I moved in I spent with Manu on the couch where we talked for about six hours. He told me he was gay and we started talking about homosexuality in general, a topic that up til now I wasn't engaged in. For me it is something so normal in our society that I don't understand why people would have a problem with it. However, I never had such a close gay friend and wasn't aware of many things we talked about. We spoke about family planning for example and how complicated this is for him.

Throughout the months we became very close friends and now I would call him a brother rather than a friend. Not only do we see each other every day, but we also hang out on an almost daily basis. Furthermore Manu has a special gift: everybody likes him. He has the characteristic that everyone who meets him feels comfortable around him after just a few minutes, no matter his/her cultural background, his/her age, which gender or sexual orientation that person has and how well they know him.

Jeromy, another flatmate, warned me: “Watch out with Manu, he is going to steal your friends.” He was right about that. Everyone I invited over always asked for him, at parties he was the center of attention and whenever I met friends outside the flat they wanted me to bring him.

One example: I met a Couchsurfer from Egypt. Couchsurfing is based on the idea that you sleep on strangers' couches for free while traveling and offer your couch to travelers when at home. During his time in Madrid he spend a lot of time with me and my friends. In his reference about me he wrote: “from the 1st day I arrived she welcomed me in the best city in Europe, showed me around then went to meet her BEST roommate ever Manu ;D, best day ever with this dude, -ask for him if u r to be hosted by Joanna- he is one of Madrid landmarks :D”

I think it's so great that someone who comes from a country where homosexuality isn't widely accepted writes so positively about a gay man. No matter how liberal he himself is about the topic, in his country that opinion is not accepted and the fact that he writes these words shows that it absolutely doesn't matter what sexual orientation you have.

I would love to introduce Manu to everyone I know. He is one of those people in my life who deeply fascinate me and from whom I want to learn. I hope that I can also have such a positive charisma that people feel this comfortable in my presence. Of course there are days where I am annoyed with him and get in a fight, because he doesn't clean the bathroom. But that's the way it is with family.

I hope that everyone who reads this will be lucky enough to meet Manu one day.